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This is too correct :rotfl:

 

Less than a week until Halloween, time to get scared -- not of the ghosts and goblins, but of the fuss-budgets.

 

It happens every fall. Health officials feel obliged to bombard parents with advice intended to keep youngsters safe/suck the fun out of trick-or-treat night.

 

"Small children should never carve pumpkins," Health Canada warns us this year. "Instead, let your child draw a face on the pumpkin." "Be sure children eat before going out trick-or-treating," advises an Ohio hospital, "and take along a few healthy treats in a separate bag for snacking." "Young children should not have gum, nuts, hard candies, seeds or other choking hazards," read another nugget.

 

"Try to finish trick-or-treating before dark." "Consider hosting a Halloween party instead of sending kids trick-or-treating." OK, so I have some advice, too: Stop letting hippies breed with bureaucrats.

 

Too late. Having banned fireworks and turned the distribution of homemade treats into a hanging offence, the Toddler Taliban have now succeeded in encasing children in bubble wrap.

 

The culture of overprotection has become pervasive. Children grow up without any sense of personal responsibility; anything not specifically proscribed is assumed to be safe.

 

Parents have lost all ability to gauge risk, won't let their offspring walk to school lest they be accosted by some non-existent bogeyman, where the real danger lies in the conveniently prepackaged poison that mom has crammed in Junior's lunch box.

 

North American news media have bought in, too. A month ago, we all fluttered predictably when Fisher-Price recalled 11 million toys, some of which had been sold as long ago as 1997. Why the recall? Well, in the case of the seven million recalled tricycles, six children required medical attention after falling against a protruding plastic "ignition key." To repeat, that's six out of seven million -- you have better odds of being struck by lightning or winning the lottery. (Meanwhile, 31,224 Americans were shot to death in 2007 alone. Guess the recall notice from Smith and Wesson is sitting on the edge of somebody's desk.)

 

Kids grow up in a world of car seats, airbags, childproof caps, bike helmets, Day-Glo vests, orange cones, liability waivers, best-before dates, Stranger Danger and duck and cover. Canada officially became a nation of pinkly soft, jelly-spined wusses on April 29, 1997, the day that Craig MacTavish, the last player in the NHL to skate without a helmet, retired.

 

It's no better in the U.S. After Vancouver Canuck Rick Rypien briefly grabbed a Minnesota fan by the shirt last week, the man's first reaction was to run to a lawyer, apparently suffering from post-traumatic stress, or perhaps wrinkled fabric.

 

It wasn't always like that. Fans used to be made of sterner stuff. Jeez, way back when, I remember seeing a priest climb the glass to take a swing at a referee. (Do that today, the ref would get grief counselling.)

 

It's the kind of memory that brings a tear to the eye, the one that the Toddler Taliban keeps warning we'll put out if we don't stop running with scissors, as though the Good Lord hadn't given us a second one for a spare.

 

The predictable irony is that the kids have rebelled against this well-intended suffocation. Extreme sports are booming in popularity.

 

Last weekend, Jackass 3-D, a film devoted almost entirely to images of men hitting themselves in the nuts, did $50 million at the box office, a record for October. Consider it porn for a generation raised with a puritanical approach to personal safety.

 

Something to think of as you prepare Junior for Halloween. And no, a hazmat suit is not a costume.

 

Jack Knox is a columnist with the Victoria Times-Colonist.

 

 

Read more: http://www.calgaryherald.com/opinion/Knox+scary+when+hippies+bureaucrats+breed/3731714/story.html?cid=megadrop_story#ixzz13gcux7IO

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